being Shreya

woke up 830 with ma screaming her usual "tui ki uthbi?konoi ki sense of responsibility nei?ekhono kochi khuki hoye boshe thakbi?".went up groggily upto the dining table for a glass of water(to induce pressure for you know...)shared an eye-to-eye 'good morning' with dad who was listening to mom's complaints about me like a good boy!did bathroom chores checked phone for messages:
msg1-Bushy:Shreyaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!my bhabhi's a bitch!she's blackmailing me dat she'll tell mom about my bf!
my thoughts-Bushy's bf is an oversexed bastard!her bhabhi's doing the first good thing for the family since she got married!good for you bushy!

msg2-Peachy:CALL ME ASAP!!!I NEED TO SUBMIT RESUME FOR ARTICLESHIP 2DE!!!!!!!DUNNO WT 2 RYT!!!!!!!!!HEEEELLLLLP!
my thoughts-sigh!peachy wilt thou never improve?*plan a way 2 smuggle phone when mom's not looking*

msg3-dhuh:u cald yesterday?sorry i wasnt around!nthg imp no?u ok no?cl me wen possible!gt2 tl u loads!
my thoughts-yes...you were not around!and all ok except that i'm totally in love with you and you are too thick to notice!n what you got to tell me is probably about the girl u have 'recently developed feelings for'.so even though u are my best friend,i think i ll avoid calling you!

msg4-puchy:u've 4gt10 me!nt gud!
my thoughts-i'm now a changed person and do not call friends who don't bother to grace my unrecieved calls with even a missed call

msg5-Kiran M Patil:a shayari dat made me wanna throw up!
my thoughts-your name has three initials,your hair is parted in the middle and i had slapped you for pestering my friend.GET.OVER.IT.

dad comes to kiss me goodbye.(he left for Delhi dis morn)I take up Don Juan and make a brave attempt to read it.creep from study table to bed on pretext of backache.fall asleep.mom enters the room(i quickly prop myself up and innocently pretend to have been studying all along.mom's not fooled.or impressed).she declares she's going saree shopping for my cousin's wedding.i inwardly rejoice!mom leaves @10 after a long list of dos and donts.i reach for the phone and call peachy.we talk for two hours (half an hour on the resume).next i call dhuh.talk for one and half hour.he keeps after saying "promise you'll call in the evening?" i promise with a bursting feeling behind my ribs.i realise its lunchtime.wake up didi(she had a night shift).lterally catch her by the scruff of her nightsuit and direct her to the dining table.i love this sort of a role reversal.i serve her lunch.chatter away so she can keep her eyes open atleast while eating.finish lunch.tuck the baby back to bed and get back to calling friends in need.speak to Bushy for 1/2 hour (my phone is free btw,the Govt foots the bill).solve all her family troubles.get a call from Dipdop who cries her heart out about her boyfriend who is now in Singapore.comfort her.this call is quick because its STD!sit on the net.orkut till 5 and then decide to call college friends.call moo.moo calls diggums.diggums calls ankie.we all yap together in conference not making much sense of what the other person is saying.they refuse to talk about my (non-existent)love life,i refuse to talk about studies.they refuse to get together and catch a movie,i refuse to flock together to the library.talk on senselessly till 6.mom arrives.hurriedly keep phone.she looks murderous because she had been trying to call on the landline all day.as had been the driver.as had been 20 other relatives.i can think of only one word-shit!

sit at my studytable and pick up Tess.feel sad about not being able to call Dhuh.Didi leaves at 10.mom and i have a quiet dinner(she's too angry,i'm too scared).then we realise how long it's been since we had dinner like this.just me and mom.the six years we spent only with each other-when dad was out fighting terrorists and didi was out being wooed by her soon to be hubby.get quite sentimental!those were the days.watch t.v together for some time till mom falls asleep(after a tedious day of saree shopping).i go back to doing sinful things like orkut and calling Dhuh!