I really don't understand this.I never imagined i could ever say-'life sucks'.But here I am.The reason?my friends.I mean-WOW!The only times i was ever upset over a friend was when there was a fight.And these phases always ended with warm hugs and sincere apologies.Things seem SOOOOOO different now.Everything seems to scream out- i really have become a doormat.Complete transformation.Close friends have gone so far away,and new friends have come so close.perhaps i expect too much,but then don't I have the right to?I don't think I am drowning in self pity.I am too critical of myself to know when I am doing that.It's just that bonds seem to have cooled down,and i am tired of trying to stretch the relationships all by myself.So,I'm finally buying myself a spine and adding the long since required selfishness into my attitude.I just hope i don't hate myself for it.